Last Tuesday was our first appointment with the homestudy agency we've selected for our adoption. Amy watched the kids for me, and I met Eric downtown at the office of
Catholic Charities on White Bridge Road for our noon time slot with Julie.
On the way there, I got a bit nervous. This was it. A real, true, official step toward our future daughter. We'd talked about it and prayed about it and planned, but all of a sudden it felt more real and my stomach was in knots. Kind of like standing over the bathroom counter waiting to see if there will be one line or two- that kind of exciting, yet unsure, knot in one's stomach.
And the drive there was even more reflective because I took the strip of road off 440 where West End becomes Harding. Before we had Grant, I worked at St. Thomas Hospital and Eric and I drove that way to work every morning. We carpooled, and he would drop me off and then head to his office. That route stopped when I left my job to stay home with our baby, nearly seven years ago. (That same "baby" just lost his second tooth on Saturday!) So I was thinking about the amazing passage of time, when I became a parent, and how those carpooling days with Eric seemed so long ago (and just like yesterday all wrapped into one). I was thinking about my three children, and a little girl, that may not yet be born, who resides an ocean away in a foreign land and will one day be our daughter. I felt compelled to pray for her birth parents who may be struggling, who may be feeling overwhelmed, or who may be wrestling with huge decisions. I had a lot whirling around in my head. It probably wouldn't have taken much to erupt in tears at that moment.
Once parked, Eric and I came in and we waited in the lobby by a plug-in fake fireplace. We chatted about very little (what was there to say, yet?). And then we were called back. Some introductory questions were asked, and we went over all of the forms and documents and fees that pertain to the home study that would be conducted by Catholic Charities. A home study is a written evaluation by a certified social worker that recommends the placement of a child in your care. Her opinion of us will come from police records, our autobiographies, interviews conducted with Eric and I, letters of recommendation from friends, and a home "inspection". We will also need to gather official records of birth, marriage, and finances, and health. There is certainly a reason that this portion of the adoption process is called the Paperchase. Also a verb, we are now "paperchasing".
At this point, our main priority is to gather the documents necessary for sending in the
I600a, which is a petition to adopt a foreign orphan. Homeland security (or maybe its USCIS) will investigate us, fingerprint us, check our records, and (hopefully) give us approval. We need birth and marriage certificates to do this. My birth certificate is the same one I've used for everything so far. It is actually the one my mom requested a month after I was born. That piece of paper is nearly 28 years old! Needless to say, that after presenting it countless times to sign up for sports, to apply for passports, to register for college, and to obtain a marriage license, the embossed seal is hardly there at all. Worn flat with use and time, I guess. Homeland security needs a copy with the seal intact, which means I'm ordering a new copy. Thank goodness everyone in the Taiwan process just needs good copies. Some countries request originals of all documents. Timely and expensive. This expedited official "raised seal" copy of my birth record will cost roughly 70 dollars. $17 for the State of California, $19.99 for the vital records company that has a contract with California to provide speedier service, $30 for the Fed-Ex shipment. Due to budget constraints, and the falsifying of identities, the State of California is a difficult place to obtain records from. Their wait times are longer (less employees due to the budget problems) and they require a notarized sworn statement assuring that I am the person listed on the certificate. If I went the snail mail route, and requested the record myself directly through the State of California I could get the price down to $17, but I would have to allow SIX MONTHS for delivery. No joke.
Tomorrow, I plan to go to Kinko's and use their Notary Public (not Note of Republic, which I used to think it was as a child) and also have them fax the application to
Express Vital Records. Hopefully, I'll get my proof of birth in 5-8 business days. Not six months.
And while we gather these documents/records for the homestudy agency and the I600A, we will simultaneously gather/fill out similar (if not the same) documents for our adoption agency that will work with Taiwan to place us with a child. The set of documents/photographs that is gathered to directly send to Taiwan is called our dossier. Once the dossier is complete, we will be officially waiting for a referral.
Here's a summary of the process to adopt from Taiwan:
1. decide to adopt (done! June 2006)
2. homestudy (begun Feb. 2007)
3. file I600A with US government
4. gather all documents for dossier and officially apply to placing agency's program with Taiwan (once officially approved by Taiwan, we'll be on the waiting list for a child)
5. wait for referral of a child (estimated to take approx. 9-12 months from time of approval by Taiwan)
6. wait for Taiwan court process to declare us parents (3-6 months)
7. travel to Taiwan for Gotcha Day! (in country stay of 5-7 days)
More than likely, we are looking at 18 months- 2 years from this point until we have our newest daughter home with us.
At this point, we could rip off the drywall, reinforce the wall, re-install drywall, and re-mount (properly, with bolts) a new pedestal sink. Or we could spackle and hunt down a different type of sink that need not be bolted into the wall. That's what we decided to do. And once the spackle was up there, it seemed such a shame to proceed as normal with a new sink, a new faucet, and the purple walls.
